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Ruti–
I am a writer and mother of two (ages 4 and 1), and your essay brought up so much for me. I understand the sheer amount of work to do, the nursing and interrupted sleep, the details and mundanity and constant wiping of tables and floors and faces.

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Hey Rufi, thank you! You struck so many chords with my own sentiments. I am a mother of 2 daughters (one11 year old and one 3 weeks old, yes, the 11 year gap). I am a full time teacher/researcher on study leave for 2 measly two months, which, is a privilege already in my country. Husband is away for his PhD, and we basically only chat on video during wee hours when he is studying and while I am breastfeeding. Life is certainly a roller coaster. How do I channel my sentiments and rant with my days at home when he is also battling daily with his studies and his professors, nope. Just thankful I don’t need pick-up his underwear though. The challenge is when the maternity leave is over…..Keep on writing. You are an inspiration. I’m sharing your essay!

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Your essay should show that you've come away from reading the poem, novel, short story or play with a deeper understanding of these themes. The linking of technique and theme is central to the effectiveness of literature. As a children's story Little Red Riding Hood is a tale about a little girl almost eaten by a wily wolf.

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I put my notebooks on a shelf when my triplet burdens of motherhood, mortgage and man were all I could juggle. Years later, when I wondered who I was, I picked up the creative pen again. I started with poems I could scribble out after work and the dinner was done and the babies were in bed. When they got so they could get the bus home I wrote short stories and after I left my marriage the words tumbled out freely in all the spare time not looking after a man brings forth. Pressing pause on my career released me from five day a week marathons and bought me Wednesdays – a break in the middle to write up a storm or a typhoon or a haiku. I have hard won my freedom to create. My daughters conspire with me to make it so for all of us. One paints and stidies and does all our cleaning. The other studies and writes and cooks for us. We’ve stepped out of the cycle with our education and set our sites on wanting less stuff and taking more time.

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I grew up with this fear: that the material that was near to me would be no good. I would have to live a life that would somehow bring me nearer to the topics “real” literature was about: war, violence, politics, travel and adventure. To this end, I moved to New York, traveled to India, and dated men who could tell me about the worlds I did not have access to, men who had been to prison, men who had been homeless, men who had been in mental institutions. I was troubled by my female protagonists who seemed to have so many emotions. They would have to go; they would have to change. I would have to change. In short, I was certain that what I really needed to do was write for men. I’m not sure anyone has written more combustibly about this recently than Claire Vaye Watkins in her essay She writes of her short story collection Battleborn:

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Beautifully written and powerful essay, thank you. As the mother of an 11- and 7-year-old, I’ve found more personal/writing time as my kids have gotten older; older kids generally need less constant attention, and by age 10/11, often prefer to be with friends. (This of course may not be true for many special needs children.) They still need their parents a whole lot, but it isn’t the overwhelming, suffocating kind of need I felt when they were newborn/toddlers. But in my experience, it does not get easier to “do what we want.” This essay reminded me to keep asking what I want (do men ever question this?), and that I deserve help (from my partner, etc.) to get it.